Dead set in time
by Writingisfunlol
Summary: So this first chapter starts out in S7 EP5 "Swim Deep" in the motel, but technically I want to get into their heads in every actual episode to try to understand them better. It will have Dexters and Debs POV. I'm going to go ahead and rate it M for Debs language and future scenes.
1. Chapter 1

S7 EP 5

Dex

I can't sleep. I pace the cheap motel room hoping to get a better idea as to how to bring Issak down. Issak is looking for me. A boss, of a big Ukrainian brotherhood. I should have listened to good old Viktor when he said I didn't know who he was. But no, not really. He deserved what he got, but I can't let Issak get any closer. Not while he knows about Deb.

Deb. Sweet untrusting Deb.

"She looks so. Peaceful."

She had turned in her sleep and was now facing my side of the motel.

Then again Deb is only really peaceful when she's asleep. There's no chance of her exploding on you. No way for her to stare at you and try to find your naked soul and expose it for all that it is. No. When she's asleep, there's just peace.

I remember Myrtle beach. I _had_ kept my eyes on her all day. I wasn't lying when I said I didn't want her to drown. I had seen her drown before, and it had scared me.

When we were younger Harry had taken us out to a lake. I was busy with Harry, exited about getting to gut some fish for dinner, he hadn't let Deb join us so she had grumpily left to go swim. She was ten or eleven back then, and as Harry tried to talk me through the proper steps of taking the life of a fish the sudden sound of silence had diverted my attention. There was no more complaining, no more angry splashing. Nothing. I looked out to the lake to see that Deb was gone. I stood up calling out to her which quickly worried Harry who frantically searched the horizon for his daughter. I spotted her floating and ran. Ran. The initial thought of her lifeless body exiting, but as I brought her still shape back to shore, the idea of loosing her paralyzed me. I didn't know what to do. Taking life was so easy for me, but how do you give it back?

Harry had pulled her out of my arms and given her CPR for what seemed like a lifetime. Doris had ran out and begun to cry as her only biological child lay on the very fence of life and death.

I stood there watching. The image of the three etched into my mind forever. When Deb finally coughed I hadn't realized that I had fallen to my knees. That entire time my mind kept screaming _Take me. Bring her back._ Once she was up and the danger was over she was not allowed back in the lake, but she hadn't minded. She was just happy to join us.

Harry pulled me aside later and spoke to me.

_You did good Dexter. You should always look out for Debra, when your mother and I are gone she's all you'll have._

_She wouldn't have been in any danger if you would have just let her join us in the first place dad._

_No Dexter. You know why that can't be. Your sister must never know what you are, remember that..._

But she knows now. Everything is different and yet, she still loves me. She saved _me_.

I feel calm. Watching as her chest rises and falls while she sleeps, peacefully unaware of all that surrounds her. Unaware of me watching. She stirs in her sleep, and then her lips part and my name gently escapes them.

"_Dex.."_

Has she seen me? I await, but I'm not greeted with the colorful language she would use if she did catch me watching her. I breath a sigh of relief realizing she's just dreaming and even in there, in the realm of all that is Deb. I am her protector.

* * *

I want to do the next one in Debs POV let me know how you like it and where it should go from here. Hurricane Sandy might keep me writing all week :)


	2. Chapter 2

__S7 EP 5

Deb

_"Dexter! Dex..."_

He's gone. Deep under the waves, I can't see him. I can't catch him. And there is no fucking way I'd go under there. I'm safe here.

The ocean waves crash at my feet and the horizon seems to go on forever as I wait for him to resurface. He comes up out of the water and looks my way, smiling that crooked grin of his, his hand shading his squinted eyes from the sun. He looks young, and handsome, water dripping down his face and chest. This all feels like some cheesy romance scene from "The blue lagoon" or something. He dives in again and I get a sudden burst of courage and decide to dive after him. I was going to catch him. I know I _can_ catch him.

_"Wait up Dexter!" _

Young me dives under a wave but suddenly the memory of having my legs wrapped around something thick and long engulf me with this age old unrecognizable fear. I panic and swim towards the surface but I can't reach it. Out of nowhere as if by some miracle Dexters arms pull me out, saving me. Present me.

"_Deb?"_

His arms where still around me, his eyes piercing into mine. Questioning my well being.

"_Deb, are you ok?"_

Birds began squawking around painting us into this beautiful fucking sunset. We weren't young anymore, not like in Myrtle beach. Dexter wasn't his awkward sixteen year old self, with lanky arms and thin angular face. He was his present self too. He was broad chested, strong arms. I gulped.

_"You're my hero"_ I said smiling, my arms wrapping around his neck.

I spoke too soon. All of a sudden the day turns dark and winds begin to blow taking the birds with it, Dexters arms do not leave me. He holds me tighter. An icy pair of arms reach out from the under the water and grasp at my thighs.

_Jesus fuck_. It was Rud.. Brian. Brian Moser. I scream and bury my hands onto Dexter. He looks at me, this puzzled look in his eyes as if he could lose me and then he looks down at Brian. His hand that previously held the small of my back comes out from behind me and he's now holding a knife.

_"Holly shit Dexter!"_ I yell, still clinging onto him. He ignores my exclamation, choosing to keep his attention on the knife. My attacker is now pulling me away from him and into the water. I can't breath from the struggle and the shock. The last image I see is Dexter debating wether to let go of me or to attack. His anxiety becomes blurry as the cold water begins to cover my face.

Brian Moser smiles at me from above the water as his cold hands fighting me for my neck, he grips it tight as I struggle to breath. He was winning.

_"Not Deb Brian, let her go. Let go!" _I hear hazily from above the water.

His inner debate is over. Brian's weight is lifted off of me and all I can hear is splashing. I bring myself out of the water regaining my breath coughing and crying startled by the sudden turn of events. I look around trying to find Dexter who is uncontrollably stabbing away at the red waves that fight him for the corpse of his now dead brother. He began to slow down as a searing pain begins to grasp at him. I can hear his voice break as he falls to his knees and talks to the waves.

_"You can't have Deb Brian. Why? Why would you.."_

He stared at his bloodied hands, the knife dropping and sinking into the water. I slowly inch towards him. Not knowing if it is safe, not even caring. The waves begin to calm and turn blue again, the birds chirp and the sound begins to blur into the background.

Dexter rose and wrapped me in his arms, making sure I was still there. His hands skimmed my head and my shoulders protectively before they wrapped me back into him for a tight embrace. I feel so whole, like this. So _calm. _I Sigh.

_"Dex.."_

In my dreams Dexter had saved me countless times, how many times had he done it in real life? He might be a monster but he saves so many people with what he..

_No_. What he does is wrong, wrong wrong so fucking wrong on so many levels. and oh fucking great, the Rud.. Brian dreams are coming back.

Dexter is nothing like Brian. Brian was a monster who killed for fun, Brian didn't care for anyone, he was just a sick bastard who thought he could play with people, who thought he could play with me. Dexter. Dexter I've seen him grow, he's good and decent and I know it. I _know_ him. Even what he does, how sick and wrong and disturbing it is, he does it for others. Jesus. I just.. I still can't swallow this shit.

_"Can't sleep?" _Dexter asks not turning to look at me.

_"It's hot as hell in this shithole"_

I hadn't realized I was tossing and turning. It's still dark in the room. Dexter is sitting by the window, keeping guard I assume.

_"Have you been up for long?"_ I ask.

_"Not really"_

I sincerely hope he's telling the truth. I tend to talk in my dreams and I hope I didn't say anything stupid. At least the dream wasn't erotic this time, boy would that have been embarrassing. I sigh.

_"Go to sleep bro, we're in the middle of fucking nowhere. Issak isn't coming tonight."_

I'm still groggy and now I'm sweaty. I had probably really gotten into my nightmare. I wonder if Dexter heard any of it.

Dexter exhales walking around to his bed.

_"Yea I guess not. You're probably right but better safe than sorry right?"_

He gets into bed, leaving the covers off. We are both silent for a while, neither asleep. I can see him staring at the ceiling. I can't help but wonder what he's thinking. He probably feels me starring. He looks over.

_"Deb I wont let him get close enough to hurt you" _Oh, he definitely might have heard something.

_"How? You'll kill him?"_ I wish I had sounded more disapproving. I'm scared for him, for his safety, his well-_fucking_- being. This Issak prick. He's not just some loner serial killer. He's from the fucking mafia.

_"If I have too I.."_

_"Go to sleep Dex. You're right I don't need to hear this."_

I _can_ save him. I can do my job. If just this once I can keep his monsters at bay I may be saving his life. Dexter carries this burden, this "dark passenger" because of Harry. The least I can do is save him from our.. _my_ dad.


	3. Chapter 3

S7 EP 6

Deb

Fuck him. Ungrateful shitstick bastard. I can't even.

_"He was sleeping with his fucking tenant. In Rita's fucking house! Jesus fuck Dexter!"_

The pillow that was laying on my lap flew across the room. He thinks I need a life?! That I need to get out there? Who the fuck does he think he is?! He spends his fucking free time stalking and killing dipshit murderers for Christ's sake! And apparently fucking with them too!

I get up to grab a beer. Cool down, I need to move, run. Do something my mind is racing at a mile a minute and I can't shut it up.

God! I can't think straight. Laguerta is onto him! And he wants me to back the fuck down? He'll get caught! Ungrateful little shit! All Rita ever did was love him!.. He couldn't even wait to fuck around with someone else? To at least move her to a different fucking location. I know he's a sick bastard but.. what the fuck Dex..

I can feel tears running down my cheeks. I hate _this. _This feeling. This feeling of loneliness, emptiness. Like no matter what I do, or what I want for him matters. This impotence that I can't reach him. I can't get to all that is good in him. Jesus fucking Christ it just keeps getting harder doesn't it? Laguerta wants to bring him down, her hunches are so spot on that I'm scared. She might get him. If I wasn't here to throw her off, she _would_ get him. She would've gotten him! Just that one lousy picture. He would've gone down. _I_ saved him. And it's like he doesn't care.

I keep trying to make this feel normal, as normal as this shitfuck of a mess can ever be, he says that he wishes this would stay the same as before but ever since I found out, he's just further. Further away from me, like the light in him is shutting off. He's shutting me out. I can feel it, just as I can feel my hands shake, just as I try to calm my breaths so that I don't sound so fucking pathetic sobbing my heart out. Fucking wishing things were different.

I asked for this didn't I? This distance? I asked him to hide this side of himself from me. But there is no point. I'm his guardian, the keeper to his deepest darkest secret. And it's a fucking full time job.

Of course there's also her. _Lumen. _She got to see the real him. All of him. She shared his secret.. and his love. He was _her_ guardian. He protected her from the sick bastards that hurt her. Saved her. He loved her, maybe even more than Rita. Lumen actually knew him. But what tore them apart? The look in his eyes was sad. Like if she had abandoned him, left him with his love and his secret. Alone to carry the fault of their sick deeds. Fuck you Dex, I'd never do that. Running doesn't seem like an option for us. He may be the sickest fuck on this shithole planet, but like it or not I can't stop loving him. I've known him my whole life, the good in him. And as much as it twists me up inside, the darkness in him is not far from his light. Even through his monster. His heart is in the right place.

* * *

I'm going to leave you all with both of their POVs for the night. Jesus this episode drained me -_-..


	4. Chapter 4

S7 EP 6

Dex

She smells of dirt. Earth. And of an angel. A dark angel. Hanna is laying in my arms, in my bed, in my apartment. How did it get to this? I was supposed to literally _take her out_. To kill her. What have you gotten yourself into?

It would have been so easy there, in the middle of nowhere. Surrounded in artificial snow. Just to her liking. It would have been almost poetic, and yet ironic. For our precious little gardener to die in a frozen wasteland. But she hadn't died at all. My mistake.

She tosses in my arms, her soft skin gently skimming mine. Her smooth freckled skin. I can't help but inhale and ravel in her smell. What is happening to me?

Hanna Mackey is a murderer. She lives her day to day life pretending to be this innocent victim. Dragging around her sickness and spreading it around the people who love her, infecting them like a disease. Sinking them down into a spiraling rabbit hole. Like a deranged pied piper._ Like me._

All I had needed was a kill, a nice little break from being the perfect brother. Or at least trying to be. I needed that _release_, that image of the floodgates opening and just letting all this stress out. And here I am. Sleeping with the enemy. If only Harry could see me now.

" _I am Dexter. What are you doing? Look at you? Debra was right, you are selfish. Not thinking about how she will affect Debra's case. Your life. Harrison's life."_

_"Harrison has nothing to do with this. And I__'m not. I'm not selfish. Hanna has immunity from the police, she no longer has anything to do with Debs case" _I reply.

"_All Debra has done is try to help you, to hide you. And here you are. Betraying every single one of her rules Dexter. Lying, hiding evidence from the police department. Sleeping with a murderer."_

"_I'm sure she'd prefer I fuck them then kill them."_

"_She's not going to like this Dexter."_

_ "She's not going to know."_

"_You've practically thrown her at Sal Price, and you know Debra. If he talks to her, she will find out everything you know about Hanna. She wont think twice about doing the right thing Dexter and all you will be is in the way." _He pauses.

_"This Dexter, this will truly hurt her. How much more will you hurt your sister?"_

"_I'm not hurting her! Deb wont know. She doesn't want to know alright! She will never accept me... and I can live with that."_

But I can't live alone. I may be a monster but Harry didn't raise a loner. I _need_ connection. I _live_ for it. Debra has chosen to leave, to be blind to the _real_ me. But I have tasted the intimacy of someone knowing my truth and I want it back. Deb has denied me that. If I ever wish to be understood, to be accepted. The only place I will find this is in the arms of a killer. In the arms of someone _like me_.

* * *

Sorry they are so short. I really want them to come out of the characters heads, and not go into any of the next episodes drama.


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